Thursday, December 15, 2005

Warning, lots of pics, and blogage lol

Okay it is late and I have a horrible headache/ear infection so I may have typos lol, hard to type with one eye half shut lol ;) Lots going on the past two days. Lets see two days ago we took the boys to the mall in town to see santa but he would not be there until 4pm, well it was only noon so we thought we would drive into town to see santa at the other mall 25 miles away. Well we get there walk all the way across the mall and OOPS would'nt you know, santa was sick and not there so we got a coupon lol. So we looked around, stopped in a couple stores to do some "window shopping" (great now that song by 50 cent is in my head lol) any ways so I stopped in Bath and Body work to spray myself with some yummy scent, well I mixed a couple things and moved on, later that night I kept smelling this awesome smell. Well the next day we went back to the in town mall to see santa at 4PM, The boys were so cute! When santa asked Austin what he wanted for Christmas he said "a new big boy bed" it was so cute! We are going to see if we can get him a twin bed (with the help from the Christmas money D's grandparents sent us yesterday, they sent us money to take care of all our gifts, so we thought we could do this for austin) Then we had pictures taken for MIL and the inlaws (it was only $12 for a 5x7 and 4 wallets) and they let me take one with my camera...
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After we went window shopping again, well I stopped back in Bath and Body works to of course do the spray thing again LOL ;) well I went straight to the two bottles I sprayed myself with the day before, together the smell of both of them together was AMAZING! I loved it! Here they are :) ...
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Cherry Blosom and Warm vanilla Sugar, and this shimmer mist is awesome! This is so going on my Christmas list :D or something I will treat myself to when and if I start doing EBAY again.

They also have one of my all time favorite scents there (I am a huge bath and body freak lol and have a nice little collection I started a few years back of all the lotions and sprays and this is one of my favorites)
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Coconut lime (it has a hint of vanilla), if you have not smelt or tried this then you HAVE too! You will love it! and the lotions are so good! They keep your skin so soft and they smell so good! Oh and right now ladies they are having a sale on all the antibacterial soap buy 3 for $10 (I did not get anything but this was a sale they were running until the last days of Dec)

Anyways we had a great time yesterday. I also did a small little photo shoot with the boys yesterday that went a little wacky, I did manage to get a couple good pictures after about 150 LOL, if one boy was not moving then the other was. It was so hard! Here are some of those pictures...
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I had to bribe the boys with candy LOL and at one point I had to place the candy tin on my head and on the camera just to get them both to look at me LOL. Okay I need to get to bed, Jay Leno and Johnny Knoxville are over (love johnny) so nightie night :)


Monday, December 12, 2005

What to do, What to do?

I woke up early today, I did my one mile walk away the pounds DVD and then had D watch the boys while I went outside for a walk. It was nice.
I have spent most of the day being lazy. I did take the boys to walmart to get milk and a $.97 tape measurer. Well I was in the craft section I saw this Making Memories embellishment kits, they are a $30 value for only $9.99, they had all kinds of things in them, including one of my most favorite things by MM, simply stated rubon alphas YAY. LOL Sadly we have no extra money so hopefully there will be at least one left there after Christmas. I also looked to see if they had those lunch boxes I saw a thread about in the PUB, but did not see any at walmart.

Speaking of scrapbooking, I finished my 4 layouts using the LRS Dec kit. I was so happy with them and LOVE the one I did of D "The one that I love", I posted them in two different galleries but they did not get much love at all, maybe they are not as good as I thought? I am thinking I need to work on my scrap style, I need to make my layouts more eye catching. Maybe I need a mentor or muse? someone who can help me find a better style, help me improve by telling me what I am missing, tell me all the new trends and latest styles etc.

Here are those 4 layouts...

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So I was reading one of my most favorite blogs " Pink is the new blog " evah :) and LOOK What Trent has...

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You can get them at and they are only $20 BUT they are only on sale until 12/16/05 then they go away forever. I soooooooooooooo WISH we had the money to get me that black one, I want it so bad! Maybe I can tell D I want it for Christmas ;) lol

Speaking of Christmas I need to get my hiney in gear and get something made for MIL, my folks, FIL and his wife and D's grandparents. I make them all something handmade each year. I just have no clue what to do this year. Anyone have any ideas? I need to get whatever it is done by Friday lol so I can get it to them on time.

Okay well I need to get the boys down for bed and maybe watch a little tv before bed. Night all


Wednesday, December 7, 2005

Horrible day

Everything is just so crappy right now! Things going on here at home, I feel so worthless, like I don't matter, my feelings, I feel taken advantage of!

Things going on with a friend I thought was a friend, she got to know me, I thought I got to know her, turns out I was being used and she quickly moved on to the next "best thing" as she likes to call it! And now I am being ignored!

I can't seem to get anything done today, I have tried but I get no help from D who has been home all day.

My work stinks, I stink at it today, could be because I am not in the mood for anything now that my whole day has just fallen apart, funny how one bad thing happens and everything starts to fall apart.

If you make it a point to make friends and get to know people PLEASE watch yourself, there are people out there that are just using you! They do not care about you as the person you are, just what you CAN do for them at that moment in time, then they throw your friendship away like it does not matter! I met someone a few months back, she came to me telling me I inspired her and she loved my work, we started talking alot, about work,scrapping,our families, She would ask me for advice on scrapbooking and of course I would give it to her,, I thought we were friends, but then she just stopped talking to me, out of the blue, I have seen her move on to others, pretty much doing the same thing she did to me! WATCH out on who you trust and let into your life! I know from personal experience! Hurts like HELL when this happens!
Nuff said!


Tuesday, December 6, 2005

Under the Christmas Tree

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This was my two year old today. I saw him playing under the tree, I thought nothing of it and continued to read. About 20 minutes later I heard my 4 year old yelling in his room, so I got up to go tell him to play a little lower with his voice. When I can back into the living room I found my son sleeping under the tree like the picture above. Boy does it bring back childhood memories!

as long back as I can remember my sister and I LOVED to camp out under the tree, the lights, the smell. I am glad to see my boys picked up on it too :)

Well I pulled my stuff out to scrapbook today, had it all set up out here in the living room on the coffee table (instead of back in my room where I have all my scrap stuff set up) so I could be close to the boys and D. D was home this afternoon (working late) so he watched the boys while I started a layout. After he left to work the boys were impossible! Fighting, throwing toys, hitting, jumping, bouncing you name it, they did it! I got my work out in today for sure! the minute my butt hit the floor to work, that same minute I was up to get them away from eachother. right now it is 20 minutes until their bedtime and they are wired more then ever. I even had to put my scrap stuff away for now (dt stuff) and turn out all the lights (not the christmas tree) and put on boomerang (flintstones on right now) to try and calm them, where are they? One is screaming and yelling because he can't pass a game on his PS2 and the others is in and out of his room with his HUGE fire engine. Not to much longer before D is back home YYYYYAYYYYY :) Then maybe I can take a nice hot bubble bath with a book and then come back out and work on this layout more. (crossing fingers) It's a layout of my youngest in his Peter Pan jammies :) goes very well with the papers from the kit this month from LRS.

Oooooo GOSH I am wanting a soda sooooo bad, I had to share yhe very last one with Aidan tonight lol, and now I want another one, I am thinking about putting on all my warm clothes just to go get one from the apartment vending machine lol. I just may need a Pepsi to stay up and work tonight lol.

Okay well I better get back to the boys. TTYAS


PS, yesterdays Anniversary was nice, I cooked an awesome meal and we all spent time together. and D and I cuddled, I always LOVED cuddling with him, we did it more so the first couple years we were married lol, so it was so nice to do it last night, we even both fell asleep cuddling on the couch LOL, we both woke up with stiff necks at 4am.

ahhhh okay really going, just had austin out here screaming about aidan spitting is milk in his eye, and they are fighting again :( Calgon take me awwwaaaayyyyyyyy........

Monday, December 5, 2005

Scrappin, well trying to anyways...

I just received my DT kit for Little Red Scrapbook. It's awesome, It is a kit that works around the new Chloe's Closet paper called "The back Nine". Soooo that means boyish colors :) YAY, which is perfect for all the pictures I just got back from of the boys. I get to play with some Black and White pictures as well as colored and what is cool is the background colors match the kit colors AWESOME! I have to admit I was a bit nervous of the Dice paper but, it looks so awesome in person, and Thanks to my friend Kristie I have an awesome theme, that will go perfect with the Dice paper, RIGHT ON! Here is what the kit looks like...
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and then of course the awesome ADD ONS are amazing too and work so well with this kit!
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I can't wait to get started, it is all sitting right in front of me and I have about two hours to work on it now (before D gets home and we celebrate our five year anniversary :D) I just picked out the pictures I will be using and now all that is left is to sketch out all my layouts and projects I will be making and then let the scrappin begin. I have been feeling IN the MOOD to scrap the past couple days, just have been so busy here at home. The plan is to get a bunch of scrappin done this week when I can :) Okay I better go get started on those sketches :)


Five years ago today...

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For The one I love on our Anniversary

I hope there is never
a need for you to wonder
how strong and deep
my feelings are for you.
We may have changed a little,
grown a lot,
but what's been constant
is how much I need you
in my life...

If my words
sometimes fail me,
always remember
what's in my heart,
You touch my soul...
and always will!

I love you!

Happy Annniversary Dustin!


Sunday, December 4, 2005

He never gives you more then you can handle

I need to be reminded of that often. I have had a pretty rotten week, It got so bad I started to doubt myself, my worth, everything. Not only has my marriage been a bit rocky latey but things in our life and household started to fall apart. It all started last saturday. My DH went to a concert and that went great, I was happy he was going, a bit jealous lol (the place looked awesome!) I wanted to go, but very happy fpr him none the less. To make a long story short, the car broken down, he lost his cell phone (we just ordered this new on last month because the old one broke, it was $75 added in payments on our current bill) and he could not get home until 4am. He also had to much to drink that night. You better believe I was a bit angry with him. First off remember 6 months ago me blogging about the transmission on our car needing to be rebuilt, well $2084.00 later it was fixed. My parents of course payed for it because there was no way we had that kinda money. My parents Christmas gift to us this year was buying all new tires on the car also. so that was another $400 on this car. well Monday D took the car back to the shop that did the trany work. (we had to use some of our rent money to pay to have the Explorer towed, so of course we needed to get help with some of our rent this month :(, it's just a huge mess and when things like this happen to people who just live and get by with each pay check it makes it hard). A couple days went by and then we got the phone call from the shop saying what was wrong with the trany was not part of our warrenty and it would cost $900 to fix (SHOCK!) I was so mad! Not only do we not have $900 but how was my husband going to get to work everyday which is about 25-30 miles away. They wanted him to come down to the shop (which is near D's work), but he had no way of getting there. We asked FIL if he could help, he said yes that he would take Dustin the next day, well that next day it snowed heavy all day and night long, so FIL could not take D and he had to call in sick to work with not having a car and all. By this point I was losing it, thinking GEEZZ will we ever get a break or see the light? I then get a phone call from the owner of the shop, he was very upset, angry, mad! he Said it looked like D had abused the car, with what was wrong with the trany, something with switching the gears the wrong way and shavings in something (I do not know car talk lol), I explain to the man that this is our only car/truck/suv (whatever you call it) that we have had alot of money go into it, it is the only way DH can get to work, I can not see him abusing it. The man did not want to hear it. He said it was $900 in parts and they were not going to do anything with it until D went down to see it himself. I was so paniced about D losing his job because surly he would have to call in sick again. Well I spent most ofr that day on the net and phone calling all the car rental places to see if we couple just rent a car, all of them wanted Major CC except one place called enterprise, they would rent the car for cash, but for 8 days they wanted $450.00 plus a $150 deposit, again we did not even have that amount of money until D gets paid. So D asked FIL if he could rent the car, at first he said yes, but then he said he just could not do it, if something happened it would be on him.

We went to bed that night not knowing what the next day would bring, the whole week had just been this huge mess, lots of emotions, very trying on us, you know through it we really bonded though, things have been not so good for us lately but we stood by eachother during this horrible week! the next day (Friday) FIL came to get D to take him to the shop, I sat here on pins and needles until D called. He said the owner of the shop was out of town but he spoke with one of the guys working on the car and he said that it would now only be $500 to fix. Still alot and sad it's not under the warrenty but $400 cheap is ALOT and we were grateful! D also said FIL let him use his truck the rest of the time we would not have the car! I was so glad! That meant no more worry about him maybe losing his job over this. That same night my MIL called from CA and she said she would help us pay for the car to be fixed. I was in tears! We are always in a funk this time of year, money is the tightest and it's just the hardest time of year for our family. I was at my lowest this week thinking everything was over and then all in one day I saw the light! It was amazing! We are so Grateful, and if that was not enough, Yesterday (Saturday) Smil and FIL came over, they brought us a Christmas Tree. I took one wiff of that tree and the amazing smell and it felt like Christmas! I thank the good lord above for our families! They have always been there for us when we needed them no matter what, yes it makes me feel so bad that at our age (26/27) that we need help from our folks still, but what an amazing family we have that they are "there" for us.

We are going to put up all the Christmas Decor today. The boys are very excited! Since the tree is in the living room this year (instead of in the dining room with the bay windows) we decided the tree colors will be red and gold and white, since the living room colors are burnt red and mocha. I am also handmaking a Christmas Card holder today, I will post pictures when I finish :)

Okay well I better get a shower in while I still can this morning lol. I am also waiting on a phone call from my Folks, right now they should be resting in my Aunt Rubi's house in Ireland :) My mom has been waiting all year for this, she did not do her normal 2-3 visits this year, her and my dad both wanted to go this time and for a whole month (my dad is only going half the month since he has work to do at home). They were so excited about this trip. Hope you all have a great Sunday! I will post pictures later of the tree and Christmas decor stuff :)


Sunday, November 27, 2005

Slowly but Surely

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For those of you who have been following my blog for sometime, you know I have been working out and losing weight since March. Well I popped on the scale today and have lost another 10 pounds since last week. I have actually only worked out once this past week though, I did a power walk last week in the morning on the trail next door. I think this weight is actually off because of the added stress in my life lately. Anyways, last week I also moved the treadmill in to the dining room from our bedroom (neighbors down stairs pound on my floor if I do it at 10am back there, since you know they are up all night and sleep all day "eye roll". So now I can walk on MY treadmill and also switch off at the gym. I have now lost 53 pounds since March. I have about 30 more pounds to go to reach my pre pregancy weight of 117/120. I am hoping to be down to that size by next summer, that would be so awesome! :)

Time Machine

My Husband asked me today if I could go back to when we first met and started our lives together, knowing what is happening now and how our life has been, would I do it again. I thought about it, and here is my answer....

If I could go back to Jan, 2000, YES I would still go out with him, yes I would still have my beautiful kids. BUT YES I would do things differently. First I would make sure that I did not blow off nursing school, Even though I was Pregnant with Austin, had a full time job I would still try my hardest to get through nursing school. Second I would have never chose to stay home, DO NOT get me wrong, I LOVE being able to be home with my precious boys, but because of me staying home, not working, not bringing in money, it has a big part in what our lives are like now. So yes I do blame myself for some of why things are not going good in our marriage and family now. I have also become so dependent on my husband. I hardly have any contact with the outside world, no friends etc. This is my fault. So yes if I could go back into time knowing what I know now, I would have done things different. I think this would have made me stay the strong girl I was back then. Now I feel like I do not matter, I am weak and far from strong.

I am not going to go into detail here about our problems, but it is not looking good. He wants to have "His" life to do what he wants and I want what's best for my kids. I have put 150% in to this but it's not working.

Anyways I don't even know why I posted this :( I just really have no one to talk to and it feels good to let it out.


Thursday, November 17, 2005


More and MORE Drama with the neighbors downstairs. I have done everything I can to make everyone happy and it is not working :( I wish we had the money to buy a home, they are so cheap here and if we could save money we could, you can get a 3-4 bedroom, nice house here for 90-130 thousand. My parents live in CA, in a 3 bedroom the 740 thousand so YES WE CAN make it here, but we just need the money now. I went down today and got an APP from a place I am not going to mention yet, I don't wanna jinx myself lol. but I will post if I do get the job! It would be great! With me working and with D working we can start saving. We really wanna move to Bend, OR. (secretly I would love to go home to CA too :( I just miss it so much, my family and Friends). I have been talking to my best friend of about 17 years now on the phone and I just miss it there and her :(. Bend is a GORGEOUS place and would be great to raise our kids, plus it is affordable to.

Anyways I thought I would just pop in with a little update. Guess I could not stay away from my blog that long huh, funny when you let something go, you really do miss it. I love to journal. Okay going to go finish clean up the apartment and then maybe scrapbook :)


Wednesday, November 16, 2005

apartment living :( AH!

I am back I will write a post after I get this out...

So I had problems with my neighbors down stairs a few days ago, I will post the thread I posted at LM when it was happening. I spoke with the manager and she is giving them two violations, one for noise late at night and the second for the crazy man not being on the lease but living there for more then 10 days. She said if they get one more canplaint that they will get their 30 notice. I was hoping with all that has happened that they would have been kicked out :( then yesterday while I was back here on the computer working on LM and GFTH stuff Dustin comes in and tells me that the crazy neighbors downstairs have friends that are looking at the apartment up stairs (shock) um okay yeah so now we can be sandwiched inbetween a BUNCH of crazies :( I am so upset about this. And I am just so said that I have to keep warning my boys to stop playing like normal because they might piss off the crazies down stairs :( I fill like this is prison instead of our place :( okay whine over I will go post a more positive post now....

Here is my thread I had at LM...


It is now 1:16am and I have just been through heck and back! For those of your who have read my blog you will know what I am taking about from past vents. So we live in an apartment. On the second floor. We have had countless problems with the people who live below us, since they moved in. here is a quick recap, the very first night they moved in we were all awoken at 3am to the sound of a man and woman fighting, it got really bad to the point I thought the woman was badly beat up. I was so scared for her from what I heard. So the next day I called the manager and she said if it ever happened again to call the police, She also gave the woman a warning and told me that there should be NO man there , he is not on the lease (if you have a guest at your apartment who will be staying over for more than two weeks the than need to be added to the lease). Well I guess she knew right away it was us who called on her and so the crazyness begins. It started with them pounding here and there throughout the apartment, they would pound on their ceiling/our floor. One morning I was working out to my walk away the pounds dvd at 10am and she went crazy on the floor, pounding away and cursing. I called the manager right away and the manager came to both apartments (mine last) and said that the lady said there was no man there and that her and her kids were sick blah blah. Well first off I told the manager the lady could have come up here at said can you keep it down, we are not feeling good and trying to rest, But instead she acted like a child and pounded at her ceiling. She continued to pound off and on through the many days to come. a few weeks later I was in the kitchen putting dishes away and getting ready to bake a cake for the boys. Aidan was laying in the dining room with his blanket, looking like he was picking that spot for his nap. It was 4pm in the afternoon, he stomped his foot on the floor (while laying down) all of a sudden the woman/man started pounding away on our floor, aidan thought it was cool and pounded back, then them again, it went back and forth and I was getting POed! so I stomped back (jumping up and down three times, yes I know, I was now acting childish but I was so angry) I decided it was time to go down there for a talk with them as soon as dustin got home. Well minutes before dustin got home and some after they were in a huge fight down stairs, it sounded like the man was hitting her again. Well first I called the manager to let her know what was going on again. She told me that she wanted us to talk it out. So I went down I noticed her kids were in the car, but she was not there, I waited a while and then went to get the mail, when I was coming back she can out of her place so I went up to her and said, Hi, I think we need to talk. I got a dirty look and she was rude. We got into a heated argument about who is making more noise blah blah, then she tells me I am the childish one because I compain to the manager about her, I said she was because she pounds on the celing and is doing it to little kids who are either playing or just walking. It got REALLY REALLY loud and ugly, bad names back and forth etc. I screamed a few more things and went into the apartment. I was so mad! I could still hear her out side in her car screaming things, so I went back out and called her more names (YES I know we are both being childish now) she drove away, I went back inside. I sat back here thinking about posting what happened here or blogging it. I sat here looking at the screen and then I suddenly felt very bad, I have not behaved like that since highschool, and then I felt very low because I realized her kids were right there watching all of this. Soooo I went back downstairs and waited for her, aidan came with me and we played in the yard down there. When she came back she looked a little nervous. she just sat in her car. Finally she got out and I asked if we could start over. She smiled and looked happy about that. So we spoke out there for almost an hour. It was good, I told her I only called the first time because I was scared for her, because of the fights and she sounded like she was being hurt. She told me her BF looks mean but he really is not (I don't believe this because of many things that happened down there after this talk with her, and after tonight I know what he is like) He came back she introduced us and they went inside. I felt so much better after this. Our kids even played together at the park. Well about a month ago another one of these fights happened, and someone in our building called the police. The man had blood on him and when asked by the poice why? He said "I grabbed a picture of here off the shelf and broke it over my head" so see see what we are working with here.... anyways, I have no doubt in my mind that these people think it was us who called, soooo then the fauding begins again I got ugly looks from her, there was pounding etc. Well tonight, it is 10:00 Dustin gave both boys a bath, got them dressed and they were all sitting in the dark living room playing video games. I am sitting back here in my room at the computer working, not making much sound at all. the tv was on, but very low (I was watching how to lose a guy in 10 days) well I start hearing pounding back here, my heart jumped it scared the heck out of me. Aidan comes running back and says pounding, pounding. I get up to go into the living room to ask if dustin heard it, he says no. So I start walking back to my room and there it is again only 1,2,3,4,5,6 pounds very loud, shook the stuff on my shelves. I am getting angry again, I sit back down here and there it is again 1,2,3,4 pounds, so I get up and stomp back 3 times. more pounding from them. So I get my nikes on as fast as I can, I don't even lace them and head downstairs. I knock three times. No answer, so I knock three more times, still nothing. As I start to walk away the man opens the door, I ask if there is a problem and right away he blocks me from looking in and says that my kids are pounding, I said no sir, I am the only on in that room right now and I was sitting down working, there was no noise. He starts yelling and says my kids are loud and pounding, so I say again, no sir they are in the living room with their dad, far away from where you were pounding. he yells at me that he can hear them. I say sir if you have a problem them you should come up at tell me, please don't pound, he yells at me. I tell him even if they were being loud or stomping I can not stop them from walking in their own home or telling them they can not play right now, I said look your kids are awake and screaming right now (they were just having fun playing, I could hear them) I said so why are you making a big deal out of this when the same thing is happening in your home (as far as the kids being up and all) he tells me his are not stomping, I laugh and say um yeah well how do we know what it sounds like no one lives under you right? But I can tell you like I told your GF before that we can hear you guys, we can here the kids playing at 1am, you guys talking, the walls and floors and thin and this is going to happen sometimes. He gets mad and starts to close the door cursing at me, I then get mad and say that I will just tell the manager in the morning, he curses, and then I say back, I am sure she will be pleased to here that you have been staying here for the past two weeks when you have been told before that that is against the rules. Door closes I head back upstairs. 20 minutes later, Dustin is in bed and the boys are sitting with me getting ready for bed and watching cartoons. There is a knock at the door. It's the police. I let all three in. They say they got a call that someone was hurting their kids and that it was our apartment. I roll my eyes and say are you sure it was not down stairs. he says no it was here. They say they got a call that a man was hitting his kids up here. (the boys are both sitting with me on the couch happy as can be, excited to see police (they love police shows and toys and games) I tell them that Dustin was sleeping has been for a while now. They asked when he came home, I said a couple hours ago, they asked how long he was sleeping, I said about 30 minutes. they said they got the call 15 minutes ago. They asked if there was fighting going on in the building and I told them everything about what happened tonight with the people downstairs plus everything from before. said not only have I complained but so have others and if they wanted to see for them selves they could call the manager. They were very friendly to the boys, who were running around looking at the police men, they said aidan looked like he could be a football player etc. lol They said they were so sorry they had to come out that is was obviously just a case of fauding neighbors. they said that they were going to go down stairs to see if they could get thinsg better between all of us. everything calmed down, the police finally left and everyone in our apartment were alseep by 11:00pm. I called the office and left a message for the manager explaining what happened tonight and that I wanted to speak with her in the morning. So I am sitting back here, everything is off except the muted tv in the living room were austin fell asleep and my computer which is muted to since everyone was sleeping. I was shrinking photos in photoshop, at 11:30 I start hearing some crazy pounding on our floor/their ceiling in the living room where my son is sleeping. It was very crazy. then I hear doors slamming downstairs and the people going in and out of their apartment back and forth to the garbage and then more pounding in my living room. They had to have been tossing something hard and heavy against the ceiling, this woke austin up and was scaring the heck out of me! So first I call the office to get the noise on tape so the manager can hear it herself and know that I am not making this stuff up. Then I am on the phone with the police. I tell the lady who answered that I am not sure if this was the right number to call (911) because it's a complaint on neighbors not really an ER, she says she can take it, so I explain what was going on and then there is loud pounding at my front door, and the man is scream through my door, says his name and a ton of curse words. I am freaking out now, my whole family is asleep and this crazy guy downstairs is at my door screaming and knocking, the 911 lady tells me don not open the door BUT go ask what they want so I get there and do what she says, the man tells me to shut the f up that we are all making to much noise. I tell him that everyone in our house is sleeping, there is no noise. He tells me to open my door I say no, mean while the 911 lady can hear everything he says, then the lady from downstairs (I think she is seriously on drugs!) tells me to open the f'in door "B word". I tell them that I am on the phone now to the police and they run down stairs. The lady on the phone says there should be police there now and hangs up. So they go down stairs to talk, within a minute they are back up here, I let them in, it's three again, two of them that were here earlier. they say that they were pounding because they said we have music going on loud up here, and the police then say they could hear it too, that it was very loud, I say sir my family all went to bed right after you guys left earlier (it's 12:00am now) they could see that from austin on the couch and one of them took a peek in my room to see aidan and d asleep and my computer on (I told them I was up still doing work, had a couple last minute things to do for work and then was going to bed) they sent one of the officers down stairs who then came right up and said he could still hear the loud music from down there but it was obvious that it was not coming from our apartment. So they opened the balcony and looked out thinking it could be apartments behind us or the neighbors on the therside of them next door (on their left or right downstairs). They again said they were so sorry about all of this and that they would handle it with the people downstairs. I heard them tell the people downstairs that the noise was not coming from us that everyone WAS in deed alseep in out apartment that they saw for themselves, and that it was someone in one of the other apartments, I could hear the lady laughing. they more words I could not make out and then the police left. I have countinued to hear them yell and bang thinsg downstairs. I am just sitting here freaked out. I left yet a third and final message to the manager letting her know what just happened and that the neighbors where up here knocking and I am sure everyone in our building could hear what happened. I have no clue what will happened tomorrow, but I am sure the manager is not going to be to pleased with any of us at this point. I honestly tried to make thinsg better by going down and trying to work on this like the manager asked me to, but it did not work! I can say I HATE apartment life! This is so sad, that we have to deal with this. This never happened with the nice woman and son who use to live down there the first year and a half we lived here. We also have MIL as a witness to this wackyness. While she was here, the lady downstairs just lets here young kids, 3 and 6 go out to the park by themselfs everyday, well she watches two other little girls 2 and 3 and they were all outside hanging of the stairs and in their panties, running up and down the carport, no one watching them. We were all leaving and noticed no one was out watching them, so we (the boys me and mil) watched and waited in the car as dustin asked the little girls to go back inside their house with their mom he then went to the door and knocked, it opened but the mother was no where to be seen, so they little girls went in and dustin closed the door. We all left, I of course forgot some pants I had to return (we were going to the mall) so we turned around and sure enough within 5 minutes the little girls were back outside in their underwear alone! My MIL witnessed this, so this is just more proof. I really hope something will be done this time. Not only was I scare tonight but I was freaked out for my family. If you made it this far, thank you so much for letting me vent. I could not call anyone because it's late so I thought I would vent here. Thanks to those of your for listening to me and please if you have any advice on this, if you have been through stuff like this with neighbors I would love some advice on what you did! Thanks ladies! I am now off to bed, I am so tired, but still so scared!

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Break from bloggin

I am going to be takin a break from bloggin, not sure if it will be a long one, or if I will be bloggin again next week. To much is going on around here, I am in a funky mood and I just don't have it in me to blog right now. Not that anyone even really reads what I have to say anyways...

Far well blog, until we meet again...


Wednesday, November 9, 2005

Bad blogger... Bad blogger, Chatterbox addict yikes

I am sorry to those who like to read my blog, sorry I have not updated in a while, it's been a busy couple of weeks! I am back though :) Nothing to new going on, I started back at the gym again, I am hoping it sticks longer this time LOL. We had a great Halloween weekend and it was so wonderful having my MIL here, I was so sad and depressed when she left :( I really miss her and my family in CA. We took the boys to the park, pumpkin patch, shopping, we baked goodies, it was just a great visit. I am sad that I did not get in to many pictures. I was really sick on Sunday, the kinda sick where you can't hold anything down and you have to stay in bed all day. I was so thankful my MIL was here, I have no idea how I would have done it without her!

I have been a busy girl this week, lots of DT stuff to do and I also have the Lifetime moments charity auction to work on this week. We just got it up today, and it is doing great so far! So many talented people donated their awesome work for the cause (to help kids in need at Christmas).

I just got my cards ideabook/magazine back today, I got my two cards, two copies of the book and an awesome goodie box! I got a SEI kit pack and OMGOSH I got a few sheets of one of the new CBX lines, of course not enough to fill the need but I got a few lol, I totally need more! and can not wait to get my hands on more of this line and the other new line. I have a BAD BAD BAD Chatterbox addiction, I mean it's nuts! I have been...well....... collecting the paper for a few years now, my collection is now over 5 inches tall! I am serious! This is my all time favorite pattern paper line! Just to show you what a nut I am I took a couple pictures of it lol (blush) SEE....

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I told you and you know what, I NEED MORE! I am serious! Everytime I have a little extra change I get a couple sheets here and there. It is a sickness, a good, wonderful, amazingly awesome sickness lol and OMGOSH The smell! My chatterbox paper smells sooooooooo good! (okay now I just sound like a crazy person lol) well what can I say, I am an ADDICT!


Friday, October 21, 2005

I finished my halloween projects :)

I finally finished most of my halloween projects, I still have to finish the mini album I am working on but this is what I have done so far. I am taking the rest of the day off from scrapbooking to spend time with the boys :) Here is what I did get done using the Wendi Speciale Designs OCTOBER KIT. I am pretty happy with what I made :) SUPER FUN kit!

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Here's a card

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Have a great day :)


Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Awesome CD alert

So I am finally getting a chance to sit here and finish up my halloween mini album that is late for WSD :( I am so sorry I am late, it has just been a hectic couple weeks. Dustin is off of work today and I am on a roll and working. Anyways so here I sit suppose to be in a Halloween kinda mood, but there is nothing SPOOKY about what I am listening to while I work LOL. If you don't have the new Mariah Carey CD then come on girls (and guys lol) Go get that CD (The Emancipation of MiMi). For those of you who are my close friends you ALL know what Mariah means to me. LOL I have been a Mariah Fan since I was 11 years old. I have every CD she has ever made along with all the inports (CD's and songs never released here in the US) and of course my famous Mariah VHS movies (lol I should probably get them on DVD now lol). LOL in highschool I was often called Mariah because of my long very curley hair (lol thanks Monica and the girls ;)

Well I have the CD in and am rocking today, may even bust out my older MC CD's, I LOVE Mariah's remake of "The Beautiful ones" (by Prince, another one of my favorites). Okay well I better get back to work and stop messing around, I will be back later :)

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Monday, October 17, 2005

Okay so it did get better :)

Okay Drama queen is back lol. Boy was it rough this morning, however it did start to get better, Aidan took a nap and that gave me time to work more on my mini album for the DT, it was to late though because the dt gallery was added shortly after and I could not upload because we went and did things for my birthday. So again, I suck because of that, but you know what, it is my birthday and I was enjoying time with my family! This whole weekend away was wonderful to, I was just telling my mother tonight that we all have had more fn this past weekend then we have together all year! It was just so awesome! LOL none of us wanted to leave.

So around 4pm today I hear a knock at the door, then Austin comes back here and tells me someone is knocking, so I stop working and head for the door, I peek out the peep hole and see a pretty blond lady standing there with something in her hands, when I open the door she asks if I am Nikki, I say yes and she hands me this...

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The card said they were from my MIL. How sweet is she! I called her and thanked her :) I decided not to let the day get to me and just relax so I ran a hot bubble bath and soaked for an hour, then D got home and walked into the bathroom with these...

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24 red long roses. He said that he went to the flower place that Costco gets them from just to make sure he got the red ones. How sweet huh and I think it makes up for the 30 joke (eye roll) he said he owes me 27 spanks too (shock) LOL. We got ready to go out and he took me and the boys to Chilis. mmmmmm it was so good! the four of us split a chocolate shake with chocolate sprinkles (Austin drank most of it lol) I got the steak fajitas, LOVE those, Dustin got the ribs and fries, austin got pizza and Aidan got a corn dog and fries. The boys did pretty good minus Aidan pouring sugar on half his food, and Austin is strange when it comes to pizza, he likes to add ketchup to it (yuck! lol). After that we went to look at Bunk bed prices, we want to get the boys beds soon so we shopped around looking at the different prices. Then we went to Mervyens, EVERYTHING was on sale, so I decided for the first time in 5 years to spend the birthday money my folks give me for my birthday every year ($100) on clothes for myself, BOY was that hard! I wanted to spend it on the boys and clothes for them to lol. I sure did make out to! The awesome L.E.I sophia hiphugger jeans I love so much were on sale and marked down from $44 to $28, so I got two pairs in black lol. I also got 6 shirts, 3 T shirts all only $4 (love these for the gym or hanging out around the house (I got pink, white and light grey), then I got an awesome limeish green colored shirt with sparkles down the V necked area, a cotton black "E" (ellemenno) long sleeved lounge shirt, and a Cami tank that feels so nice, for when D and I go out downtown or on a date somewhere (I wear these with a buttoned overshirt unbuttoned though) oooooo and I also got a new Black hoodie YAY. All of this for a little over $100. I still have some money left over to (about $130 for bday money) so I may have to go back and get a couple more things from that awesome sale!

D also got himself a couple pairs of jeans and 3 shirts for work, the total for all our purchase was $178.00 We saved $186.93 from the sale, CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? Awesome! We NEVER get o do this because we never have the money to spend on ourselves to get clothes, but we saved for D to get some new work clothes and with my B-day money we made out! I am just so thrilled to have my jeans :)

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Okay well I better get to bed it is late and everyone is finally asleep YAY lol. oh before I go I just wanted to say Thanks to all who posted on the MB's wishing me a happy birthday! That was so very sweet of you all and it sure did make my day today! I am so blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life and as my friends! Thank you all! I love ya guys! :)


Should have gone back to bed!

I hate this day! Every year I should just stay in bed but nope I get up and have to live through this horrible day! Okay yes I know you are thinking OH NO there is the drama queen but seriously if you went through this horrible day I am having you would be UPSET to!

Lets see, I was woken up at 6am by Aidan who stuck a ahem "dirty" diaper in my face and announced he went poopoo, GREAT! So I get up get him fixed with a new diaper and put him back to bed. I had the heater on last night because it was cold and and I am trying to get rid of this cold I have had for a week, someone (ahem "D") turned it off last night then took all the covers on our bed for himself so here I sat freezing and my throat is killing me again, you know that scratchy feeling and you cough but it does not help, aftering doing this 20 times you now feel worse but also gained a headache, that is me today. So I fall back to sleep. Aidan came in at 9am, I am still tired, I wake Dustin up to tell him his alarm is going off and ask if he could get up with Aidan and let me sleep in a little longer that I am not feeling good, so he gets up, uses the bathroom, goes to get aidan a cup of milk comes back to our room mad, I ask why? he says Aidan took the milk out of the fridge a while ago and now it's warm so it's ruined. He poors it all out. Then he climbs into bed and goes back to sleep. So I have to get up to be with Aidan. When D finally gets up and gets ready for the day, he is kinda in a bad mood today and it shows in his tone and his comments. I think to myself great here we go, my birthday curse. Never got a Happy birthday he just runs to work.

One thing after another has happened this morning, Austin and Aidan keep fighting, all morning long, I am rushing to finish my mini album for a DT project that was due yesterday but I was out of town visiting my Grandma and could not finish, I pmed the DT and let them know I would not be able to have these in until later today last friday but did not get an answer, but did get an email this morning addressed to the group that the DT stuff is going up today, so now I am rushing to finish, yes I know my fault I am a huge disappointment to everyone, I SUCK, I know! I should have just taken this stuff with me to work on in the hotel, but nope did not even cross my little brain!, so inbetween trying to finish this project and getting everything scanned in before the DT stuff is put up (crossing fingers) I have had to deal with so much SHIT! yes I am cursing now because I am very angry! I have had to stop the boys from fighting, I had to clean up the fridge, kitchen floor and CARPET because Aidan took the mustard, ketchup, and Mayo out of the fridge and decided to make art on everything (I just carpet cleaned two days ago). I have had to fish Aidan out of my bathroom maybe 10 times already, a roll of toilet paper is gone, my yummy almond cherry soap that Dustin's brother and wife gave me last year is all gone (brand new bottle I have only used it a couple times), there is sopa all over the mirrors the kitty litter and food is all over the floor and mixed together (where was I while this was happening? in the kitchen cleaning up that mess). I found tacos Dustin had leftover along with some leftover cheese cake smooshed into the carpet, I will be carpet cleaning soon. Let see, my oldest thought it would be nice (he was being sweet) to scoop out the kitty litter earlier and that caused the toliet to flood, why? Because we just switched to scoop away and you are not suppose to flush it because it hardens when wet so you can scoop away pee, so it got all hard and clogged the toliet , it took me 8 flushes and so hard plunger work to get it normal again, hoping it does not hurt the toliet and piles later on though. My youngest has had more poop diapers today then he has had all week YUCK! We will NOT talk about the HUGE mess in the living room, it looks horrible and I can't clean it now because I really need to finish this project.

Now here is the kicker the thing that brought me over the edge and it is only 1PM, and the reason I am sitting here venting now, I have noone to talk to this is why I am venting here, I can not wait to see the way the rest of the day goes =( My husband calls me 5 minutes ago to say he is sorry for forgetting it was my birthday and wishes me a happy birthday, I say it's okay, I am happy he remembers now (okay sorry just had to go out and stop more fighting between the boys) I am in the middle of saying something and he hangs up on me, I think hmmm okay. So 5 minutes later he calls back, says he hung up because his boss needed to talk to him (strange it's D's break). So he then says that he called his dad a while ago and asked if him and SMIL could watch the boys for an hour so we could go out to dinner, he says FIL sounded upset and did not want to do it, so he said for D to call SMIL and see if she would be okay with it, D did not do this yet, I told D to forget it that, that right there was obvious that it was not going to happen, I said we can just take the boys with us, D said no. Then it gets silent again and then the shittyness starts, he says "SO HOW'S IT FEEL TO BE 30" My jaw dropped and the tears came, not that I mind turning 30, but HELLO, I am only 27 today, what the hell! I tell him I have to go and he say alright fine and hangs up. I am now so tired of all of this and just start crying. a couple minutes later I call back, he answers the phone saying "hows the birthday girl" (shitty tone) and I (crying) say forget today is anything, we will just go on like any other day, no dinner, nothing, you can go out like you wanted to with your friends or brother and I will just stay home and watch the boys. he says "what me saying you are 30 means nothing, get over it" I say it was hurtful because I am only 27 and you know that, you said it to be shitty! and YOU are only a year younger, how would you like it if I was putting you down on your birthday?

I don't know again maybe I am just being a drama queen, but it has been a shitty day, I can't wait for it to be over! Right now the only thing I want for my birthday is to just lay in bed and not have to deal with the fighting, the diapers, the mommy can I have, Mommy he did this, rude comments, I just want to lay here, maybe read a book, sleep, I don't know, I just want to be alone! Okay Vent over for now!


Sunday, October 16, 2005

My grandma, small vacation, My birthday tomorrow

We just got back in tow town. We met my parents in Prineville OR to visit my Grandmother who is in a hospital for elders there. We left the house Friday night after D got off of work, around 9:30pm. We made it to prineville at 3:30am, BOY were we so tired, half way there Dustin got tired so we pulled over and switched, I drove about an hour and then he wanted to take over again. I was so tired we got into our hotel room at Staffford inn (BEAUTIFUL ROOM!, My dad always picks that best rooms!), it had two double queen beds, a mini kitchen, bathroom, desk area and a louge area, and my folks room was connected through two doors. I went to bed right away but the boys were wide awake and Dustin stayed up with them for another 30 minutes, I was awoken at 4:30 am and 6am by the boys who never went back to sleep (eye rool lol) I heard a knock at the door, it was my dad at first and my mom followed behind him.austin ran up to my dad gave him a huge hug and said HI GRANDPA :) My folks offered to take Austin down stairs for breakfast while we slept. After they left I put Aidan to bed and we all slept until 10:30am. We all got up and got ready to go see my grandmother. First we went to McDonalds so everyone could eat before our long visit. Most of us got Happy Meals (it's all I eat now if we go to McDonalds) The boys played in the playarea at McD's for a while and then we left. It was such a great Visit with my Grandma, I can still hear her Irish accent in her voice. She came to the US from Ireland in 1956. We all looked through an album of pictures my mother made for my grandma. We sat and visited with her for about 5 hours. We took her back to her room and as I was leaving the room I look above my grandmas dresser and saw this collage, there were many pictures, but most of them were of ME when I was younger. I did not see any of my grandmas other grand kids, just me. It was a bit strange but none the less I was thrilled, One my mom does not have many pictures of my childhood (when I was about 5-6 my mom had our stuff in a storage unit and needless to say, the rent was not paid on time and we lost everything inside, including all my pictures, baby blankets, stuffed animals ect, this was not my mothers fault.) D giggled at my pictures LOL.I thought they were cute. I kissed my grandma goodbye and told her I would send some new pictures for her to add to her wall of our family. They I held on to my mom because it was very upsetting for her to leave my grandma, It hurts me to see my mom so sad, but I understand, because I feel the same way everytime I have to say goodbye to her.

We all went back to the hotel, ordered Pizza for dinner. After Dinner D and I took the boys downstairs to the indoor Pool and hot tub. It was so hot in there, they had the heater going in the room. I decided to snap a few pictures and then head to the Gym they had in the pool room only it was in it's only room (lol kinda hard to explain) I walked 3 miles at 4.0 and watched the ending of some movie about a guy named Tad Hamilton on HBO. when we finished (about an hour later) we all went to the candy machine lol got our favorite candies and headed up stairs. My dad told Austin he would rent him 4 hours of video games (austin already had 2 hours that morning) (you can rent Nintendo 64 in your room for $6.95 an hour)He was excited about that. I had to make sure to count each time he renewed his minutes so he would not go over. D spent some time with my dad. I played some video games with Austin (they had Pac Man lol) and then read my book for a while (Whispers by Dean Koontz).

After the boys went to bed Dustin and I got to spend lots of time together, I soaked in a hot bubble bath which I needed, and we went to bed. We said our goodbye with my folks that night because they had to be up very early to drive back to California for their work on Monday. I got up at 6am so I could see them off but they were gone already :( waaaa

We layed around for a while and watched St.Elmos Fire and then When Harry met Sally on AMC and then left for Bend (Dustin's treat). Had I known he was treating us to this I would have let Mely know so we could meet up with her, I would have LOVED that and I am sure Miss Dani would have loved the park we went to and all the LEAVES the boys were playing in. I have to say, the city Bend in OR is like Heaven on earth! It was breath taking! I would LOVE to live there! I have always wanted to live in Astoria OR (Goonies woohoo lol) but this place ROCKED! The people were so nice, the views were great, lots of shopping, great looking schools and there is a COSTCO! We left Bed at about 3:30pm, Dustin took a different way home and we got back here at around 10pm.

I am soooooooooo tired now but so happy for our little mini vactation. After I finish this blog entry I am headed to bed. Tomorrow is my Birthday, the BIG 27 (yikes lol). I am not expecting anything. I have learned not to get my hopes up about it because it always turns out to be a horrible day. It has been since I turned 17, anything bad that can happy always happens! LOL My birthdays are cursed! I am not sure if Dustin has anything planned or not, he did say something about going out to eat, but who knows. He did tell his brother tonight on the phone when we got home that he could not hang out tomorrow because it was my bithday, so maybe he wants to spend some time with me.

Okay I better get to bed, I just finished my Pumpkin Pie shake mmmmmmmmmmm and need to get to sleep, I will try and post tomorrow, but it depends on what might be going on. Hope you all had a great weekend!


Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Heart pains.....or not?

I am going to be super lazy and copy and paste a thread I wrote for you santa today, it explains why I have been MIA the past couple days. It is just way to much to have to retype out LOL (blush)

I have had a very interesting week which started with HOURS in the ER on Monday I woke up Monday morning at 4am with the worst chest pains on my left upper chest area (think heart) I thought I was having a heart attack! it was really bad and I was so scared, I decided It could just be nerves from all the stress I have been going through with things going on here at home and work and stuff, I layed down and after an hour I was back to sleep. I woke up around 9am with the same pain, I also felt doom, like this was it I am totally dying. My husband went to work and about 15 minutes later I decided I HAD to go to the hospital, this pain was just not right! So I struggled to get the boys dressed and walked them up the street to the hospitals quick care services. as soon as they saw me they wheeled me (wheelchair) straight into the ER. I took a couple quick tests there answered some questions and then sat in the waiting room waiting to be seen for about 45 minutes. In this time I called my DH's work (Costco) to see if he could come pick up the boys. So with DH on the way I sat waiting. They called me into the ER room with the boys about 15 minutes later. we sat in there and the had me undress from the waist up and then hooked 3 circle like stickers around my heart/chest area and then added some machne wires. This machine was monitoring my heart rate and pulse. So I did this for about 40 minutes and was stuck to the bed, it was so hard with the boys. Austin was being good just sitting watching sesame street on tv but Aidan was everywhere and in everything, The very nice nurse brought in some coloring books and crayons for the boys and they both sat on the bed with me. Austin kept asking why we were there, and I would say because mommy is not feeling so good today. My DH soon arrived and sat for a while with us but Aidan went exploring again in the drawers and stuff so DH thought it best to just take them to McDonalds for happy meals and then home until I was seen by the DR and finished. So there I sat by myself in the ER room for about two hours, I was soooooo cold by then, I could feel the AC on and being half naked well I was COLD lol. And the chest pain was so bad! The Dr. finally saw me and did a few test of his own. He said that from the monitor my heart is very healthy (I was so thrilled I cried!) and normal for a young 26 year old that I am (his words lol). That from what he can see it's not my heart but that we were going to do an X-ray just to be 100% sure. Then he pressed on the area all around my hurt and the pressure made the pain 100% worse! He started to explain that the chest wall has cartlidge in it that can become tender, for many reasons ( lifting, after you have a bad flu, injury, simply from coughing or minor exercise) hmmmm I said well yeah I have been doing lots of new things with exerciseing, I told him since March I have just been watching what I eat more and walking and had lost 33 lbs. Well I decided two weeks ago to start going to the gym and have been walking there, doing the bike and also lots of new things with weights and the "evereything" machine (lol I forgot it's name) and now 41lbs lighter, he first congradulated me on my weight loss and then said that all the new exercise is probably what has irrateded my chest wall and caused the cartlidge infection. I was SO THRILLED it was not my heart, I have always be scared my heart was bad since I gained so much weight. He said I could now do the X-RAY and he would send someone in to give me an IV with pain meds to take the chest wall pain away. IV? (faints) Well I sat there for 20 minutes then a new nurse came in to take in me to the XRAY room, she asked if I was pregnant, I said no, then she wheeled my bed in to the Xray room, weeeeeeee I took the Xrays and then before she wheeled me back she asked if I would like a blanket, I said YES When I got back into my room a young male nurse came in and brought out the IV stuff, I am sure he could tell how nervous I was, I am such a BIG BABY when it comes to needles, and with IV's it is worse, they can never find my vein so then have to poke me a few times so without me saying anything the nurse asks me if I would rather he went to ask the DR if I could get the meds in the form of a shot instead of the IV, I think I looked so happy because he said okay that is what we will do then, he did not close the curtain this time so I could see out through the door and I most have seen him run back and forth past my door 4 times lookiong for the dr, and the last time he found him YAY. sooooooooo he comes back in, in about 10 minutes with TWO NEEDLES "faints again" then I kid you not he says, sooooo you know where I have to put these right? and I swear to you I pulled that blanket straight up to my neck and said...." my ahem behind" and he says "yep your butt" OOOOOOOOKAY YIKES! Thank goodness I know that these don't hurt as bad as most shots (I use to get the Depo shot for BC there so no big deal) but I felt bad for him, he had to see a HUGE FLABBY WHITE hiney! LOL And who we will just say I got on the phone with my husband after to chit chat while waiting (I had spoken with him a few times through the many hours I was there) and I knew when those shots kicked in, I felt soooooo loopy and would be thinking the word I wanted to say like maybe "how are you?" and it would come out "you are how?" I kid you not it was sooooooo funny! Well the Doctor came back with my Xrays and said again, I am very healthy nothing to worry about (I hope he's right ) and told me he had some meds I needed to pick up at the pham in costco that would help the pain and one to help the infection. When my husband got there to get my I was gone lol, I could hardly get dressed and the nurse would ask me stuff and I would answer and it totally sounded like what I was thinking but she would look at me and my DH would have to say what I was trying to say! OMGOSH it was so funny but I was so embarressed! I hate feeling that way! Any ways so I have been resting and the new meds I am on (Indocin and ativan) make me loopy and sleepy so I have been so tired and have been sleeping a bunch. As for the chest pain, it is now mild which is super nice.

So I am taking it easy for now and hope to be back to my full self soon. The doctor also said this can last up to 6 weeks YIKES. So no more weights for now, just walking when I feel better. I really miss it though :( Okay I need to finish folding the laundry, I will try to post tomorrow.


Sunday, October 9, 2005


Mely made me take this quiz lol...

The perfect human.
12 Cruelty, 38 Anal, 30 Pushover
Congratulations. You're easy-going, friendly and know when to stand up for yourself. You're perfect. In fact, you're a little bit too perfect. Chances are, hoards of jealous people are plotting your demise at you read this. Tough luck, pal.

You can take the test here

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

energy is coming back

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Here's a layout I did this past weekend =)

YAY, well since I started going to the Gym last week my energy is starting to come back, lol I woke up this morning and wanted to go to the Gym (have to wait though), I love it because it's my hour away for a while lol (time to myself), but the downside is that means Dustin is suppose to be watching the boys. remember how I said I spend all day yesterday cleaning? I could not work nothing just had to clean up everyones messes (like everyday, but yesterdays was the DEEP cleaning) well I decided to go to the Gym at 9pm last night, leave dustin and the boys who are playing video games. Well I was only gone for 1 (ONE) hour! and what do you think I see when I get home? The BIGGEST Mess! I mean I spent two hours yesterday on the boys room, all the toys in the HUGE binned toy boxes, had to fold all their clothes, folded lots of blankets, made the beds, arranged books on the shelves, put shoes in a neat order, well I go into their room and all that I just said I cleaned is now sitting in a HUGE messy pile in the middle of their room floor and my couch pillows are on top of it all, I should have taken pictures! I was so mad, I went straight to the MAN who should have been in charge! What does he say? oh well I just let them play (um more like I just ignored them while I played my video games) he SAYS he tried to stop them, which again in MAN terms means (I ignored them while I played video games) (eye roll here lol).

My workout was good, I did a mile and a half on the treadmill, 1 mile on the bike and I did about 20 minutes on the "everything" machine LOL, I have no clue what it is called but it gets everything. I did 40 situps on it, theigh lifts and streaches, arm work, leg work. it was great! I also did lifts with the 5 pound weights for my arms. I want to buy a jump rope for the Gym so I can use that there as well and If I want I could bring in my walk away the pounds DVD to do there too. Anyone out there know what so good butt workouts are LOL, I need to get this hiney smaller! Oh and I am drinking alot more of my Dasani bottled water :) Cutting out soda!

Okay well I need to get back to finishing my kit, have a great day :)


Tuesday, October 4, 2005


I spent most of the day cleaning the apartment today. LOTS to be done (like everyday) when you live with a bunch of males lol. I am leaving soon to the Gym (went yesterday to and did 1 mile on the treadmill, 2 miles on the bike and some leg/butt and arm workouts on the machine. I did an over the arm streach thing with the machine and am paying for it now with the worst back pains =(. hope it's gone tomorrow) tonight I am just going to do the treadmill for 30 minutes and the bike for 20, maybe a couple lifts with the weights fopr my arms.

I am trying to get my eBay kits done and listed soon (crossing fingers) but it's been a bit hard. My LRS kit for October came today, I am excited to get started on that, not sure which pictures to use yet with the paper though. I also REALLY want to get to using the WSD october stamp kit, I am so loving these stamps!

I am so excited! I am doing the LM secret santa swap this year YAY, I have been in the swap every year and was so sad because i thought I totally missed it, but when people drop out there is a wait list and those people then get to play YAY. I already have been chatting with my ELF and got her first package purchased today from LM, and I LOVE my santa already. And the FUN stuff with Jen again =)

Okay I need to get my hiney to the GYM, hope you all had a great day!


Saturday, October 1, 2005

Don't lose faith, believe in yourself and your DREAMS!

So I was talking to a few of my friends, there have been a few calls and DT contest going on the past couple weeks and alot of people are feeling down, believe me girls I understand, and know it is tough, you work hard, you get your hopes up, but, just remember this "DO not EVER doubt yourself! You all have so much amazing talent, and just remember just because you did not make this team now or that call, (the one you just tried out for), well it means there is something BETTER waiting for you in the future, God has his plans for you, he will guide you where you need to go! Don't give up! Believe in yourself and your dreams! IT WILL HAPPEN!

Saturday scoop, scrapbooking, a woman's worth

I got up early today, layed around in bed for a while lol being lazy of course =) Now I am up going about my day. We just found out from Wendi who won the MUSE contest at WSD =) CONGRATS ladies! So I spent all day yesterday cleaning the house, I still need to clean out our bedroom closet but am going to spend the day scrapbooking YAY :) and I FINALLY got to the laundry basket of millions of socks lol (it's been sitting in our closet for like 6 months lol, all socks unmatched, because, well, I am lazy when it comes to socks AH! I hate matching and putting them away. But it's finally done YAY! No more socks spilled out all over the closet floor lol ;)

I plan to spend the day scrapbooking since I cleaned all day yesterday. I have this layout to finish that I started days ago but has been sitting on my scrap table, I finally cleaned off my tables to so now I have lots of room to work! YAY! I have that special project to make and mail on Monday and hope it gets to the person on time =) and I soooooooo can not wait to get started on my WSD october kit stuff, I bought a few sheets of Halloween papers and goodies at a lss yesterday for my projects, so excited about this!

Okay super super HAPPY it is OCTOBER today! MY FAVORITE month (lol fall, halloween and my birthday month) oh speaking of birthdays...


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Oh and october means I need to hurry up and find the boys some halloween costumes, I was thinking batman for Aidan and Austin keeps saying he wants to be a Zombie, have no clue what to do there, so if anyone has any ideas please help, let me know what you think ;) oooooooooo and I can not WAIT to take the boys down town for some FALL foilage pictures oooooo and with my Digital Rebel, last year I took them with my 35mm Fuji camera (love fuji) well I put the roll of film near the 12x12 baggie (full of other rolls of film I need to develope) and some how it got put in there so now it is mixed in side and I have no clue which one it is. I REALLY need to get those developed, oooooo you know what, my mother called two nights ago to let us know about our plans to go with them to see my grandmother in the hospital in OR in a couple weeks, she said she would bring up my B-day gift then and asked what I wanted, I had no clue, I was thinking about asking for a GC to a local scrap store or an online store, i could alsways use the supplies, but now it just dawned on me, I have all this film to develope that dates back a couple years, so I am going to ask for a Costco GC so I can get a few of them developed =) That would be the best!

Okay well I need to get to scrappin YAY, so I will leave you with one of my favorite alicia Keys songs (yes I know kinda old) but I love the message ;) Have a wonderful day my friends =)


OH AND MISS KRISTIE, I MISS YOU SO MUCH =( YOU NEED TO HURRY UP AND GET BACK FROM YOUR TRIP! LOL, Totally hoping it's soon! I feel lost without you!

Friday, September 30, 2005

phew, I am sleepy

I am so tired, I think I have been drinking to much soda lately and it is starting to make me feel funky. I have been super busy working on projects. I finally put all stuff aside to work on a layout for myself, I have been feeling like my work stinks lately and this was the only way I could let it out lol, I think I am happy with this layout, won't know until I am done though, which should be tonight. I also received my WSD October kit yesterday, so I can NOT WAIT to create with that, I even went to paper cottage (a lss) to get some white bazzill and saw some halloween paper that I just HAD TO HAVE! I can't wait to get started! I also had to pick up the NOV issue of CK since it is the first time I was published with CK ;) so excited! And the layout in it is one of MY FAVORITES! of course I used Chatterbox lol ;)

Well I had some DRAMA with the lady down stairs FINALLY yesterday, it was super bad, lots of words said back and forth, but later we talked it out. Okay well I have to go, sorry for the short entry I have a mountain of clothes to fold and then need to get back to work. TTYL =)


Friday, September 23, 2005


Here is a reminder (Miranda) for those of you who thought about trying out for the MUSE contest, YOU still have time so please please please send those emails in :) Here you go....

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Are you the next Muse for Wendi Speciale Designs?

We want to see your work!

Contest runs from August 16th, 2005 through September 29th, 2005. The new muse (winner!) will be announced on October 1st. (wendi's birthday...and she wants to announce the new muse as her gift!)

Contest will be judged by current Muses for Wendi Speciale Designs, including owners Sunday Vidal and Wendi Speciale. Winner will be judged on creativity, originality and passion for paper arts. You are not required to use wendi speciale designs stamps on your projects, but it would be nice to see how you use our products!

To enter, e-mail five scanned images of paper arts projects you have created (scrapbooking layouts, collage, paper arts, altered items...) to
Wendi Speciale and Sunday Vidal. ( In addition, in your email we want to know a little bit about you...what do you want from this experience?

What you will get: A free kit from wendi speciale designs every other month, design team "scoop" and recognition, ability to request stamps for assigned publication projects, and being part of a wonderful, creative and extremely positive team.

Below is a general outline of requirements for Muses: (term is for six months)
• Assignments must be completed on schedule.
• Muses must be visible and active within the wendi speciale designs message boards. (Starting and replying to threads so that you are able to help us out with making sure the boards are moving.)
• Each muse is required to attend at least one celebrity chat a month.
• Muses will be asked to vote for contests offered by wendi speciale designs
• Stay in contact and share team questions/issues with our Muse Mother (Team Leader) Debbie VanMarter
• Promotion of Wendi Speciale Designs (tell a friend if you will!

We look forward to seeing your work!

So come on ladies lol lets get those emails in =)


Foot in mouth

Oh gosh am I having one BAD week! It's one of those weeks where you just wanna dig a hole and bury yourself in the sand, or lay in bed with the covers over your head. I am so depressed right now, it is taking every ounce of my being to not cry! It's there, oh believe me it is there and ready to burst like a valcano! I told myself an hour ago to just turn the darn computer off and scrapbook, or carpet clean, something else besides sit here and talk, chat or read! Something inside was just telling me to get off, back away, do something else, but did I listen? NOPE, I never do and then I get myself wrapped up in some deep POO! Not only have I put my foot in my mouth twice today but I have manage to piss a few people off without knowing what the heck I did wrong! I just know now I am being ignored! Why do I let things bother me so much? Why should I care if suzy que or buzzooka Joe don't like me? Stupid me but I do! It hurts the heck out of me! I put myself out there for everyone to see, I tried to do things for others, I have a huge heart, I always want the best for people, so why when I give nothing but my best (the best of me) to people do they then have to turn around and treat me so mean? My gosh why do I even care? I feel like screaming, like crying, like climbing in bed the rest of the day, just to get away


Thursday, September 22, 2005

silver lining

I was checking the pub out tonight and saw a post about the top 39 entries for the AF DT were getting emails tonight, so I of course ran, skipped, and jump all the way to my email LOL. I looked in my inbox, nothing, I then had a sunken feeling, this really was going to be the end of the world lol, then I peeked over to see if my junk folder had anything ( this is the folder that emails that have never been in my inbox go straight to), GUESS what was in there :) An email from alannah from Arctic Frog! I right away moved it into my inbox, by doing so if I EVER get another email (a girl could hope right ;) from her it would now go straight to my inbox =)

I was so excited! The email said "If you're getting this email, you were one of the 39 that I'd narrowed it down to after two rounds but had a hard time getting the group narrowed down any further, You guys have truely created some of the most innovative and creative things with my product that I've ever seen. It was just impossible for me to take any more than 10 people onto the team at this time but I hope in the future that if I have a need for good pages or projects you won't mind if I drop you an email to see if it's still available for use or if you'd like to create something similar for an assignment."

HOW sweet was that of her to do this! I can tell you right now that I feel so much better! Yes I am totally bummed that I did not make it but at least I know my work did not stink as much as I thought it did (blush) =(, I really need to learn to stop being so hard on myself! I was even not so nice to my husband tonight and for that I am ashamed! He called right when I was reading not making the team and I was kinda snappy, however he did call back a couple hours later when I was calmed down and said he thought I was being so funny and cute, like a little pouty girl lol.

I thought I would pop on and update about this awesome email and what a great person Alannah is for email all of us to let us know! She ROCKS!


oh and it is 9:30pm 30 minutes past the no noise rule in our apartment building and the woman downstairs is playing loud music, here I was forcing the boys to be quite back here and she is playing loud music =\


First I just wanted to say I am so happy and proud of my friends who made it on the AF DT, you all did amazing work!!!

now on to my self pity =)

Well I just went to Peas to sit and wait and see if the AF DT calls have started and found out they came and went while I was dealing with this mornings DRAMA. I am a loser! lol loser= "I did not make the team". So on comes the why was I not good enough phase. Well I should have known better since all my layouts and projects I sent in hardly got any Praise when I posted in the gallery, but I still held on to something, hope I guess, I should have just blocked it out of my mind, because maybe I would not be doubting myself right now. Now I am sitting here wondering do I deserve even being on the teams I am on now? My recent work, is it good or does it stink? Am I letting people down that I work for? I sit here and spend hours and hours on ONE layout! it takes me ALL day to do one, sometimes when I look at a layout I have just done I think WHY? on earth did this simple looking thing take me hours to make? I am embarressed now :( I don't know why I am beating myself up about this so much, is my work to much? To plain? to shabby? UGLY? Not hip enough? What is wrong with me? Well I tried my hardest and failed, I guess it was just not meant to be for me! I doubt I even made it in to the 39 or so that they were picking from, I bet I was the first to be drafted, okay you may think I am acting childish now, I totally agree, I am hurt :(, I feel like I have failed, I am sure I will feel better tomorrow, but for now I just want to wallow in my self pity. One thing I am very proud about with my entries is that I stayed true to ME, My scrapbooking, I have always said that journaling is the number one thing I LOVE about scrapbooking, and I used it on every layout I made, so even though my layouts did not help me make the team, they did help me get apart of our lives done for our books. Okay see I am already feeling a little better, and have started to thanks to Mely! I am chatting with her in AIM and she has been great! Thanks Girlie! I am so glad you are one of my good friends! You always know how to make me laugh! Now go read that last IM too, I want those 4 pictures of Princess Dani to scrap book, I NEED to scrap a girl lol ;)

Okay Self Pity party is over ;) Thanks for listening to me whine a little ;)

thinking good thoughts.....My boys......puppies......bunnies......mmmm john mayers yummy Lips..... =)

New plan

I woke up late this morning, around 9:30am from the phone ringing but no one was there. So I got up got Aidan so breakfast, talk to Dustin for awhile, at around 10am I decided to POP my "Walk away the pounds" DVD, Aidan is right there doing it along with me when we heard/feel it, the assholes (sorry blush, I am VERY pissed off about this) down stairs start pounding on the ceiling. FINALLY Dustin is there to hear it to. I was soooooo pissed off! WHY THE HELL is she pounding on the floor/ceiling? It is 10am for heavens sakes! So what do I do??? I call the front office and talk to the manager, I told her what happened (the jerks downstairs are lucky I do not complain everytime they are up fighting at 3am and making all kinds of noise! Like yesturday at 5pm they had a HUGE fight, it was so loud I could hear their words they spoke. I tell her I think it was the man and she tells me well there is not suppose to be a man there, he is not on the lease (shock! really? well there IS a very large man who lives there, he is there everyday and night, and between the man and the woman they have a car and two trucks in the car port!) so the manager says she is gonna go tell her something (I think, thankgoodness!!!) well 10 minutes later I am back to working out and hear a knock at the door, through the peep hole I see that it's the manager, so I open the door and let her in side. She told me that the lady is claiming her and her kids are sick and they are trying to sleep, I said well it is 10am how are we suppose to know that and second so because she does not feel well we have to not go about our normal days? she agreed with me and said I am sure if she was not up all hours of the night then she would not be tired and claiming she is sick! I agreed! The manager wanted to stay a while longer to watch me work out to see if the lady down stairs would do it again, I sai I was doing it in our bedroom and Dustin was in there laying down, she then told me you know the apartment rec house has a Gym that I can work out there to, I said yes I know I am just a little uneasy about working out in front of people lol, she said don't be and that is when aidan comes running around the living room naked (shock) he is potty training so he will not keep his diaper on, so I covered him in a blanket and told her he was potty training LOL, THEN to my HORROR! Austin pulls his blanket off of himself, he was SUPPOSE to have his underwear on, but was nude too LMBO The lady laughed so hard and said he's naked too, I bet you anything my face was as white as a ghost, I quickly said good bye to her and said how sorry I was lol told her how we had to start taping aidans diapers on when he is not training or he will keep taking them off, and as for Austin he is just a nudest lol, everytime we get home he strips off his clothes, we have to bribe him with M&M's to keep his clothes on LOL =) she said believe me I understand, that's just BOYS for yeah and that she has two of her own so she knows. We laughed.

After she left I decided to get ready to go down to the apartment Gym, I should just give it a try =) right when I got my water, mags, and bag together I hear another knock, I thought this time it would be the lady from down stairs, nope it was the manager again, she had this cute little wheelbarrow wooden holder and inside was M&M's she said she forgot to bring it earlier, I thanked her and said that was so sweet. I then said I would walk with her back to the office because I was going to give the GYM a try. She said great. on our way there I said I was sorry I keep calling about the people down stairs, but I just think it is nuts that the woman was flipping out this morning about me working out at 10am LOL she agreed! She said that I should not be surprised if that woman chews me out when I see her though, and if she does then to let her know and she will take care of it, that I was NOT in the wrong by calling, and she made a comment that lead me to believe that I am not the only person in our building who has complained about this woman. Believe me I feel so bad that I have to complain, but I think it is freakin crazy to pound on walls, floors and ceilings if you have a problem, had she come to my door and said look, I know it's 10am, but we are all sick down stairs and wondered if you could keep it down, then I would have stopped working out and made sure every one in my apartment went on with their day a little more quitely. But nope the BEYOCH got Royal TUDE!

Anyways, the manager gave me a key to the Gym room so I can go anytime I want too YAY. so I am going to try and go early every morning. It was so cool inside! It had mirrors everywhere, lol so I could see all my flabby flab when I work out ;), it has a TV and DVD/VCR so if I wanted to bring my DVD I could work out in there =), It had such a COOL Treadmill, sooooo much better then mine lol, it even had a built in fan, it had weights, a bike machine, a ball, jumprope,and one of those weight machines the kind that you can work out theighs, arms, legs, back, etc (forgot the name). So I did 24 minutes on the treadmill doing a one mile walk at 2.5-3.0 speeds, I did 2 miles on the bike for about 7 minutes and 18mph, and I did 10 minutes doing the all weight machine on my arms. It was AWESOME! And the cooooool thing is this room is FREE! Comes FREE with paying our rent LOL. That is so awesome! So gosh I hope I can keep this up and go everyday! Work out for an hour each day. I feel good today too (energy wise).

Okay well I better get back to the eBay kits I am working on. I hope you all are having a great day! Thanks for letting me vent today and sooooo sorry about all the cursing today, I was just VERY POed! We all have those days right? =) (blush)